Winner of Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 212

“First, you get payment from the client, then you can chew up their contract.”

(by Jennifer Lawson)


My original Caption: “Cease and desist!”


Hearty congratulations, Jennifer Lawson! This is your first victory, with many more to come, hopefully. You are now officially “One of the Funniest People Around”, and you get all the bragging rights that go with the title.

Here are the other captions that almost made it:

“Don’t give me that circumstantial evidence crap!” (by Michael Lomazow)

“Next offense — a gag order.” (by Joe Ayella)

“You’re a bad dog, Fido. You ripped up your adoption papers. Now you have to go back to the kennel.” (by Diane)

“Where were you last night between midnight and six?” (by Rich Wolf)

“When I said to fetch me the evidence, this is not what I meant!” (by Jonathan Stein)

“If you confess now I’ll petition the court to allow your sentence to be served in dog years.” (by Lee Lacewell)

“You have been found guilty . . . the jury found many ‘shreds of evidence’ to convict!!!” (by Dominick Mancino)

“I’m going to throw the book at you.” (by Pat Foley)


Watch for Contest No. 213, which will be posted before you know it. Good luck, Captioneers, and thanks for participating!

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Welcome to the Eli Stein Cartoon archive. To begin, read my introduction and personal notes, and then please look at the cartoons, which are categorized by either decade, publication name or topic. I’ve included some personal comments, memories and photos below many of the cartoons. I’ll be adding cartoons, memories and photos ad infinitum. Remember, your comments are appreciated (just click on the “comment” link at the bottom of each post).