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Winner of Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 176

“Of course they taste bad that way. You need to peel the wetsuit off first.”

(by Rich Nagle)

 

My original caption: ” Yes, son, being a shark requires a 24-7 commitment.”

 

Wow . . . it’s a big first victory for Rich Nagle! It seems to me that he’s been an on-again, off-again Captioneer for many years, practically since I first started these contests. So this was a well-deserved win, Rich — welcome aboard. You’re now officially confirmed as one of the funniest people around.

Your caption is about a thousand times funnier than my own rather tepid original caption, which dates back to the 1980’s or 1990’s. To this day, I don’t know why I thought it was funny enough for anyone to buy it or publish it — except for The New Yorker, of course. I’m still scratching my head trying to figure out some of the “cartoons” appearing in contemporary issues of TNY. But then again, I recognize that humor is a very personal and subjective matter, and that it can go off in all different directions.

Here are the other captions that I was seriously considering for top honors:

“Forget the fish right now and let’s have some fun scaring the swimmers near the surf.” (by Diane)

“Of course it’s Sushi! Everything down here is Sushi.” (by Brendan Gannon)

“Bob, you’re always going to be just a ‘good white’.” (by Rich Wolf)

“Wanna go swim around in the shallow waters and scare the tourists?” (by Ronn Roxx)

“I know that Chinese cruise ship just sank, but I’m hungry again!” (also by Ronn Roxx)

“Let’s go scare some surfers.” (by Michael Lomazow)

“They say you are what you eat. Maybe that’s why I can talk.” (by Pat Foley). This one made me laugh out loud, Pat!

“Well, dear, welcome to the ‘teen years’ . . . the kids are off in all directions!” (by Kay Ralph)

“The Scavenger Hunt list says it has to be a license plate from Oregon.” (also by Michael Lomazow)

 

Be on the lookout for the next Contest, Captioneers — it’ll be posted before you know it. Thanks for your input!

 

 

See Comments and Add Your Own

Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 176

Contest No. 176 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You may also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot, so please follow the instructions in the “Captcha” box. Then (3) click “Save”.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, August 4, 2021.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

See Comments and Add Your Own

Winner of Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 175

“Don’t look now, but it’s a sea change!”

(by sharon)

 

My original caption: “Welcome to this beautiful tropical island paradise. By the way, are you familiar with the word ‘tsunami’?”

 

Congratulations, sharon, on this, your ninth victory! Once again you have earned the coveted bragging rights — you are definitely one of the funniest people around.

Now I’m going to apologize for not alerting everybody to what I thought was so obvious — that the caption has to come from the seashell (not from the guy who is listening). That’s the cliche that has developed in the cartoon world over the years, and I thought it was so well known that I didn’t have to mention it. Guess I was wrong. Many of your submissions had the listener speaking, and I had to reject all of those captions.

By the way, I thought that MY original caption was pretty good, too.

Here are the other captions that I was seriously considering for top honors:

“I have this weird feeling that something bad is going to happen.” (by Diane)

“This is not a test. Run like hell.” (by Michael Lomazow)

“If you put down the shell, you would probably hear me better.” (by Rich Wolf)

“Mayday! . . . Mayday!” (by Kay Ralph)

“Anyone who says you can hear the ocean in a seashell is all wet.” (by Pat Foley)

“Water, water everywhere but especially here.” (by Kelasher)

“Prepare to swim with the fishes.” (also by Michael Lomazow)

 

A new contest will be posted before you know it, Captioneers. Thanks for participating, and remember, it’s supposed to be all in fun!

See Comments and Add Your Own

Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 175

Contest No. 175 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You may also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot, so please follow the instructions in the “Captcha” box. Then (3) click “Save”.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, July 7, 2021.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

See Comments and Add Your Own

Winner of Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 174

“Ten bucks if you put me on Tik-Tok.”

(by Marc Eliot Stein)

 

My original caption: “Why certainly, my boy, I’ll be glad to share some worldly wisdom with you — if you know what’s good for you, you’ll stop calling me ‘Baldy’.”

 

Congratulations, Marc Eliot Stein, on this, your fourth victory. The last one was not that long ago, in Contest No. 170. Once again you have proved to be one of the funniest people around, so the bragging rights are all yours.

Here are the other captions that received my serious consideration:

“Never believe the hype.” (by Michael Lomazow)

“Son, it’s time we had ‘the talk’. Should I text it?” (by Rich Wolf)

“Son, that was an excellent question, next.” (by Diane)

“There, there, grandson, you’re far too young to worry about ‘male pattern baldness!’” (by Kay Ralph)

“Someday all this chaos will be yours!” (by Bruce Morgenstern)

“I’ll clean up your room if you clean up my computer.” (by Pat Foley)

 

Thanks for participating, Captioneers! A new contest will be posted before you know it, so keep a sharp lookout for it.

 

 

See Comments and Add Your Own

Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 174

Contest No. 174 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You may also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot, so please follow the instructions in the “Captcha” box. Then (3) click “Save”.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, June 9, 2021.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

See Comments and Add Your Own

Winner of Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 173

“I love you but I don’t love,love,love you.”

(by Michael Lomazow)

 

My original caption: “And what, exactly, is a ‘virtual’ marriage?”

 

Congratulations, Michael Lomazow, on your victory! I hope this will prove to be the first of many more. You have officially joined that select group — one of the funniest people around — and the bragging rights start right now.

These are the other captions that were being seriously considered for top honors:

“I would love to say yes, but I need a list of your assets and net worth.” (by Diane)

“Yes, I will, but I don’t kiss on a first date.” (by Pat Foley)

“Your health insurance or mine?” (also by Mike Lomazow)

“I’m between a rock and a hard decision.” (also by Pat Foley)

“I think your Dick Tracy ring is calling!” (by Ronn Roxx)

“Well, third time’s a charm.” (by Kelasher)

And I’d also like to give a special shout-out to Captioneer Pat Foley, who garnered Second Place in Bob Mankoff’s Cartoon Caption Contest on April 21st. Way to go, Pat!

And last, but not least,  I’d also like to say that I honestly think that MY original caption (see above) is pretty darn good, even though it’s more than 20 years old and was never bought by any publication. (Oh, Lord, it’s so hard to be humble, but I’m doin’ the best that I can.)

A new contest will be starting shortly, so keep on the lookout for it. Thanks for participating!

See Comments and Add Your Own

Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 173

Contest No. 173 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You will also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot. Please follow the instructions in the “Captcha” box. Then (3) click “Save”.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, May 12, 2021.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

See Comments and Add Your Own

Winner of Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 172

“Can you guide me to the pool?”

(by Harvey Appelbaum)

 

“I seem to have lost my way. Can you guide me to the pool area?”

(by Diane Weisman)

 

My original caption: “I’d like to pursue a career in the Sun Belt.”

 

Yes, once again it’s a tie. The obvious reason is that these two captions are essentially identical. They both came in during the first three days of the contest, before I publicly posted any captions, so there wasn’t any hanky-panky plagiarism going on. Congratulations Harvey Appelbaum (third victory!) and Diane Weisman (fifth victory!). You are now officially two of the funniest people around.

This must be a dry spell for you Captioneers. There wasn’t much in the way of sparkling out-of-the-box humor in the few entries that came in. Here are the other captions that I was seriously considering for top honors:

“Should I use SPF 25 or 50?” (by Richard). Pretty clever, Richard – – almost made it.

“You wanted to see me about my priorities?”  (by Pat Foley)

“The Dean said I should see you for some reason.” (by Ronn Roxx)

 

Contest No. 173 will be starting in about a fortnight or so – – keep on the lookout for it, and thanks for participating!

 

See Comments and Add Your Own

Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 172

Contest No. 172 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You will also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot. Please follow the instructions in the “Captcha” box. Then (3) click “Save”.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Thursday April 15, 2021.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

 

See Comments and Add Your Own

Foreword

Welcome to the Eli Stein Cartoon archive. To begin, read my introduction and personal notes, and then please look at the cartoons, which are categorized by either decade, publication name or topic. I’ve included some personal comments, memories and photos below many of the cartoons. I’ll be adding cartoons, memories and photos ad infinitum. Remember, your comments are appreciated (just click on the “comment” link at the bottom of each post).
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