March 2017

Bought and Paid For, But Never Published. National Review, 1988


I guess I have to include this cartoon in my "Bought and Paid For, But Never Published" category. As far as I know, it never saw the light of day by being printed in National Review after it was purchased. I have no idea why the editors changed their minds -- it seems like a pretty innocuous statement to me.

Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 115

                     "Wait till you see what we've done to the playroom."

                                              (by Cary Antebi)


My original caption: "And this is the door to my husband's home office."


I guess that's what happens when you submit 15 captions -- one of them pops up as a winner. So congratulations once again, Cary Antebi -- for the twenty-seventh time you have proven to be one of the funniest people around.

Here are the other captions that were in the running:

"Al and his friends take their Tuesday night poker game seriously." (also by Cary Antebi)

"You'll like him, I met him when he was in the Joint!" (by Tim Collins)

"I can never remember my password!" (also by Tim Collins)

"We don't talk about sewing club." (by Rich Wolf)

"I didn't realize that canasta was such a big 'deal'." (by Diane)

"Trust me, this is more fun than our book club." (also by Cary Anbtebi)

A new contest will start in about two weeks. Keep those captions coming in -- thanks, and remember, it's "all for fun"!

Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 115

Contest No. 115 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, March 21, 2017.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 114

                 "Give me pills, lots of pills, and the starry skies above . . . "

                                                (by John Platt)


My original caption: "Gather 'round me, I'll telllllll you my story . . . "


Well, you obviously all know your way around country songs. But John Platt's caption gave it just the right twist, so he gets his thirteenth victory! Congratulations, John, once again you can bask in the glory of being one of the funniest guys around.

Here are the other captions I was considering for top honors:

"I'll be taking a short break between each set." (by Sharon)

"So you want to hear about the windmills of my mind?" (also by Sharon)

"You're obligated to stay for the entire hour, right?" (by Joe Kalb)

"My dogies won't get along!" (by Tim Collins)

"I'm doing much better, doc. I used to have a banjo on my knee." (by Cary Antebi)

"I want to sing my new song for you, 'The Therapy Blues'." (by mel tanenbaum)

Okay, captioneers, put down that git-box and let's get seriously funny again. The next contest should be up in just a couple of weeks -- keep your eyes peeled for it and bring on those those funny captions.