January 2011

Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 17

Another tie!


"I told you she was no marshmallow!" (by Leftie)

"You may be a gentleman, but she certainly ain't no lady!" (by Gary)

My original caption: "And another thing . . . a gentleman never drags his feet!"

I smiled broadly when I saw Leftie's caption, which came in pretty early in the contest. The thought of a female opponent had simply never occured to me. So I figured, okay, that's going to be a winner. But then, at almost the last minute, Gary submitted his caption, which brought both the "gentleman" and the "lady" concepts together beautifully. So I'm declaring it a very close tie. Congratulations Leftie (second win) and congratulations Gary -- you are now officially two of the funniest people around.

There were two other captions that I was seriously considering. Coincidentally, they both involved female opponents: "You're late . . . let's get you ready for your fight. Had another argument with the Mrs., huh?" (by Cary Antebi) and "I told you not to pinch the ring girl. She's got a nasty uppercut." (also by Cary Antebi).

Nice work, everybody -- lots of good gagwriting going on here. New contest will start shortly.

Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 17

Cartoon Caption Contest No. 17 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on 'COMMENTS' underneath the current drawing. Then (2) scroll down past all the other comments and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) enter the anti-spam security word that assures me that you're a human being and not a machine, and (4) click 'Submit'. There is no limit on the number of captions you can submit for each drawing.

Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption. The cut-off time and date for you to submit your captions for this contest is midnight, Tuesday January 25, 2011.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption).

Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Here's the drawing for this contest -- hopefully it will stimulate your funnybones. Also hopefully you will come up with something funnier than my original caption, which was a gag I dreamed up when I was barely out of my teens. I kept doing new drawings for it, decade after decade, but no cartoon editor would ever go for it.


Circuits Manufacturing, July 1989


A 1989 cover for "Circuits Manufacturing" magazine, illustrating the lead article "Taking the Measure of a Solder Joint". I did the cartoon drawing in black and white -- color was added by the magazine. Parts of the drawing were also used to accompany the article itself.

Bell Telephone of Pennsylvania, 1986


This is another cartoon drawn on assignment for use in a Bell Telephone conference newspaper. One of the themes of the conference was that each and every employee of the company, from the highest exec to the lowest subordinate, was a "partner in progress" in the company.

Bell Telephone of Pennsylvania, 1986


This is another cartoon drawn on assignment for Bell Telephone of Pennsylvania. It appeared in a conference newspaper.

Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 16


"No more delays, Mr. Peterson, it's time for your prostate exam." (by John Platt)

My original caption: "You're allergic to ice."

Congratulations once again, John Platt -- for the third time, you're one of the funniest people around!

Wow, this was a tough contest to judge. I was expecting a bunch of outstandingly funny captions, figuring your imaginations would really be fired up by the situation of an Eskimo (Inuit) in full dress in a doctor's office. I was positive you could easily top my own rather timid original caption. By the way, nobody even speculated as to whether the patient was a man or a woman.

Two other caption entries I appreciated: "Take two ice cubes and call me in the morning." (by Cary Antebi) and "Have you considered a low-caribou diet?" (by Kelasher).

So what does it take to inspire you guys? For the next contest I'll try real hard to find a drawing that will stimulate your funnybones.