Eli’s Cartoon Caption Contest No. 170

Contest No. 170 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You will also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot. Please follow the instructions in the “Captcha” box. Then (3) click “Save”.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Thursday February 18, 2021.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.


  1. “It’s all good news, Mr. Rotundonato, your condition is chronic but treatable. You will be seeing me for the next ten years and its just in time for my three kids to get through college!”

  2. Sorry, Mr. Sloan, but you must vacate the office now… patients are waiting… Now, for the last time – that examining light is Not stimulating
    hair growth!

  3. ¨I went to Med School to escape the Family Mechanics Business, and
    talk about deja vu… The issues in my first case – Gas, balding and
    spare tire!¨

  4. ¨No, Mr. Merritt, we were not trying to choke you, by prescribing
    HORSE PILLS for you to swallow…Suppositories are to be inserted-
    not swallowed!¨

  5. ¨So, Mr. Carr, you are telling me, your diet consists, solely, of fruits, veggies
    and water… How long have you been delusional¨

  6. Well it could be dyspepsia or Helicobacter pylori induced gastritis, and we could proceed with nuclear magnetic resonance imaging and upper and lower gastrointestinal endoscopy, but in this case I just think you burped

  7. Good news, bad news Mr. Smith. The good news is your Covid shot is scheduled for next week. The bad news is, your test results are back and you have two weeks left to live.

  8. Good news, bad news Mr. Smith. The good news is your Covid shot is scheduled for next week. The bad news is, your test results are back and let’s just say, you may not be around for the second shot.

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Welcome to the Eli Stein Cartoon archive. To begin, read my introduction and personal notes, and then please look at the cartoons, which are categorized by either decade, publication name or topic. I’ve included some personal comments, memories and photos below many of the cartoons. I’ll be adding cartoons, memories and photos ad infinitum. Remember, your comments are appreciated (just click on the “comment” link at the bottom of each post).