Contest No. 78 starts right now.
Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old
There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.
The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, January 20, 2015.
I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.
Below is the drawing that needs your caption.
47 Comments
They forgot to build the hole
They forgot to build the hole thingy where we slip the tickets through, so I’m afraid all train departures are delayed at this time until this issue is fixed.
“And I redid our bedroom in
“And I redid our bedroom in shades of pink.”
Thanks for visiting me. You
Thanks for visiting me. You’re a good husband.
“No, your conviction doesn’t
“No, your conviction doesn’t bother me. I just met someone with hair.”
1. “Sorry, you have the wrong
1. “Sorry, you have the wrong number.”
2. “I’m leaving you for the warden.”
3. “I got $2.95 for your golf clubs at my garage sale.”
4. “I stashed the 2 million under the sink. They’re monitoring this conversation, are they?”.
1. “This will be my last call
1. “This will be my last call. I’ve moved on to wireless.”
2. “I can’t stand watching you like this…but when I sit, it’s fine.”
3. “You’re seeing another ‘ball and chain,’ aren’t you?”
At least you’ll have the time
At least you’ll have the time to accept my rematch on Words With Friends …
How many bars do you have on
How many bars do you have on your new cell phone?
Hello? Hello? The call
Hello? Hello? The call keeps dropping. Where are you?
It’s like Skype!
It’s like Skype!
Nothing much. You?
Nothing much. You?
I see you’ve had some time to
I see you’ve had some time to work on your Grumpy Cat face!
So, what are you in for this
So, what are you in for this time?
No YOU hang up first. No You
No YOU hang up first. No You!
“You’re innocent, Charles. I
“You’re innocent, Charles. I speak with conviction.”
or
“One more day and then you’re free to come home and trim those hedges.”
or
“I told you not to touch that mattress tag.”
or
“Come on, Georgie. Just once, for me. Say, ‘Hello, Clarice…'”
I’ll wait for you for 2
I’ll wait for you for 2 months. Too bad the judge gave you 10 years.
I know you will like my new
I know you will like my new husband.
I told you before you rebbed
I told you before you robbed the grocery store that it was owned by a policman.
1. “I never liked you in
1. “I never liked you in orange.”
2. “Not only won’t they grant us conjugal visits, they won’t even let us conjugate verbs together.”
3. “Maybe now you’ll appreciate my cooking.”
4. “Next time, just stick to stealing pencils from the bank.”
5. “Next time, don’t designate me the getaway driver. I told you I can’t drive.”
I don’t recognize you without
I don’t recognize you without your toupee.
You’ll just be 116 years old
You’ll just be 116 years old when you get out. That’s not too bad.
“I’ve started dating again.
“I’ve started dating again. How about you?”
Hey look on the bright side,
Hey look on the bright side, I’ll be able to spend some quality time with your mother.
Hey look on the bright side
Hey look on the bright side we can cancel our dinner reservations with the Olson’s?
1. “Don’t worry, the kids and
1. “Don’t worry, the kids and I are doing fine, in fact, very fine.”
2. “Next time, just stick to stealing pens from the bank.”
“Do you remember that good
“Do you remember that good looking public defender?”
“I afraid I am going to have
“I afraid I am going to have to Unlike you.”
“I’ve decided to join your
“I’ve decided to join your loot in the Caimans.”
“The day you see an empty
“The day you see an empty chair here, is the day after the embezzlement stash runs out.”
Next month I will be
Next month I will be carpooling with the Virginia governor’s wife.”
“I told you we were in far
“I told you we were in far west Nebraska, not Colorado.”
The house is in foreclosure,
The house is in foreclosure, the car was repossessed, the kids have taken my maiden name, and do you recall our Samba instructor?”
“We could be sipping Sangria
“We could be sipping Sangria if you hadn’t scoffed at my list of non-extradition countries.”
I bought these 2 phones ar
I bought these 2 phones ar Toys R Us. I can’t hear a word you’re saying
“The pro-bono firm’s DNA
“The pro-bono firm’s DNA sample, that would have exonerated you, was lost by the Postal Service.
“I’ll be waiting for you or
“I’ll be waiting for you or my divorce papers. Which ever comes first.”
“Honey I’ve written you a
“Honey I’ve written you a Limerick”:
My loving husband got caught
And the DA plea bargain would not,
So instead of coins
I employed my loins,
And a commutation you got.”
“Robbing a bank, getting
“Robbing a bank, getting caught, going to prison for 20 years…that I can accept. But forgetting our anniversary!”
“This is what you get for not
“This is what you get for not wearing that ski mask I knitted for you.”
“Well, you finally came up
“Well, you finally came up with a good excuse for not coming home all night.”
. . .and not only that, but
. . .and not only that, but now he’s going to try to raise the tax on capital gains..
So now you know that Sony is
So now you know that Sony is serious about hacking their Sesame Street website.
I don’t understand ,why would
I don’t understand why you would pay for it when you can get from me for free ?
Hey look on the bright side,
Hey look on the bright side, as we age time moves a lot quicker, 20 years should be a cake walk for you.
You just don’t listen, I said
You just don’t listen, I said monogamy is the path to a good relationship not polygamy.
My mother was right when she
My mother was right when she told me I was nothing but a bum.
so, cheer up honey…mother
so, cheer up honey…mother is coming to live with us and we will wait for you no matter how long it takes!!!!