“Anyway, it’s called bungee jumping.”

(by Pat Foley)

My original caption: “Whoa . . . there’s been a terrible mistake. Only the character I played in a soap opera was supposed to be killed off.”

Congratulations, Pat Foley, on your fifth victory. Your very first win was not that long ago, in Contest No. 178, so you’ve really been racking those wins up in a fairly short time. Keep it up . . . and remember to remind everyone that once again you have been officially declared “one of the funniest people around.”

Here are the other submitted captions that I judged to be worthy of serious consideration:

“Wait, you’re not putting that on my permanent record, are you?” (by Anya)

“I plead the fifth.” (by Diane Weisman)

“Do you have my email address?” (by Harvey Appelbaum)

“Please note that I’m allergic to gluten.” (by Michael Lomazow)

“You don’t check my Twitter posts, right?” (by Jonathan Stein)

“Did you just say, ‘How are you?’” (also by Pat Foley)

“Well . . . would you ever consider ‘return to sender’?” (by Bruce Morgenstern)

“While I was driving to work I selected ‘UPDATE NOW’ on my navigation app, then here I am.” (by Lee Lacewell)

“Can I keep my phone?” (by Joe Ayella)

“Is this what you do when you’re not delivering presents?” (by Ally Nagle)

“What do you mean I can’t get in until I pay off my student loans?” (by Ally and Rich)

“I guess this will be my final user ID and password?” (also by Joe Ayella)

Contest No. 224 will be up and running in due time, Captioneers . . . keep up the good work and thank you for participating!

Contest No. 223 starts right now.

Here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. To enter, simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click “Save”. There is no charge to submit captions, and the only prize is the honor of being one of the funniest people around.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This will give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. Every posted caption has a notation as to the date and time it was received. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which the winning caption will be announced and printed and I will also reveal my original caption. I am the sole judge and the winning caption will be the one I deem to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption).

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, March 12, 2025.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions. Good luck, Captioneers!

“I thought we were keeping this relationship quiet.”

(by Michael Lomazow)

My original caption: “I think it’s for one of our daughters.”

Big congratulations, Michael Lomazow, on this, your sixth victory. Your last triumph was in Contest No. 200, back in June 2023, and it’s great to have you in the winner’s circle once more. You can now bask in your glory — you are once again one of the funniest people around!

Here are the other captions that almost made it:

“I get the hint.” (by Diane Weisman)

“It’s your Not-So-Secret Admirer.” (by Joe Ayella)

“It might be a prank or it might be cause for divorce.” (also by Joe Ayella)

“This ain’t right . . . I ordered you e-chocolates and an e-card online!” (by Lee Lacewell)

“He said he’s been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty.” (by Jonathan Stein)

“It’s something that WILL go to ‘waist’, sweetheart.” (by Pat Foley)

“Is this payback for the power saw I got you for Christmas?” (by Scott Malcolm)

“They are all coconut or maple. It was a huge sale.” (by Mark S.)

“Your cheatin’ heart . . . just told on you.” (by Gary)

On a final note, my congrats also go out to Captioneer Joe Ayella, who this week was selected for not one, but two, prize-winning runner-up captions in Bob Mankoff’s CartoonStock Caption Contest. Way to go, Joe!

Contest No. 223 will be posted in due course, Captioneers, so be on the lookout for it. Many thanks for participating.

Contest No. 222 starts right now.

Here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. To enter, simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click “Save”. There is no charge to submit captions, and the only prize is the honor of being one of the funniest people around.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This will give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. Every posted caption has a notation as to the date and time it was received. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which the winning caption will be announced and printed and I will also reveal my original caption. I am the sole judge and the winning caption will be the one I deem to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption).

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, February 12, 2025.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions. Good luck, Captioneers!

“Where is it written that a gun can’t be accidentally discharged seven times?”

(by Pat Foley)

My original caption: “And I want to remind the jury that no actual animals were injured by my client in the commission of his crime.”

Congratulations, Pat Foley, for this, your fourth victory. It’s been quite a while — your last win was back in May 2022, in Contest No. 186. But now you can once again let it be known to all and sundry that you are positively one of the funniest people around.

Here are the other caption entries that I was seriously considering for top honors:

“And then the defendant pointed the gun like so.” (by Rich Wolf)

“You are getting sleepy . . . very . . . very . . . sleepy . . . ” (by Lee Lacewell)

“Who among us hasn’t committed bank fraud?” (by Michael Lomazow)

“And a one, and a two . . . ” (by Scott Malcolm)

“You’re a jury of his peers, you’re all innocent, ergo my client is innocent.” (by Joe Ayella)

“Time to decide: Tastes Great or Less Filling?” (by Kelly Nagle)

By the way, a few days ago I noticed that Captioneer Scott Malcolm earned a Runner Up prize in Bob Mankoff’s latest CartoonStock Caption Contest. Congrats to you also, Scott Malcolm!

Be on the lookout for my next Contest, Captioneers, and many thanks for participating.

Contest No. 221 starts right now.

Here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. To enter, simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click “Save”. There is no charge to submit captions, and the only prize is the honor of being one of the funniest people around.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This will give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. Every posted caption has a notation as to the date and time it was received. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which the winning caption will be announced and printed and I will also reveal my original caption. I am the sole judge and the winning caption will be the one I deem to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption).

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, January 15, 2025.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions. Good luck, Captioneers!