“Yes, we have reached a consensus. It turns out that we don’t care one way or the other.”

(by Charles+ Vaughan)

My original caption: “Your honor, I’m sorry to report that the twits and dingbats who make up the rest of this jury are hopelessly deadlocked.”

Congratulations, Charles + Vaughan, on this, your second victory (the first one was in Contest No. 157). Once again you can bask in the glory of  being one of the funniest people around.

Not much to say this time around, Captioneers. Someone reminded me that I posted another “jury foreman” drawing in this Contest not too long ago. Remember these old drawings of mine are dredged up from the many rejected cartoons of mine that have never sold to any publication, so it’s easy for me to lose track of repeat topics. Sorry about that — I guess I’ll hold back on my “law” cartoon rejections for a while.

Anyway, here are the other submitted entries that I was seriously considering:

“I’m sorry Judge, but the jury is deadlockd on whether we should order deli or Italian food for lunch.” (by Diane)

“We were promised ‘Judge Judy’!” (by Kay Ralph)

“Oh we have a verdict, but you won’t get it until we get lunch.” (by Rich Wolf)

“Remember Henry Fonda in 12 Angry Men? Well, we got one.” (by Pat Foley)

“You think we’re gonna reach a verdict? We can’t even agree on being vaccinated.” (by Marc Eliot Stein)

“You better get out of there before the judge comes back.” (by Michael Lomazow)

“How do you expect us to make a decision if you won’t lend us a quarter??” (also by Charles + Vaughan)

Another Contest will show up in no time at all, Captioneers. Thanks for joining in, and please remember, it’s all in fun.

Contest No. 177 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You may also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot, so please follow the instructions in the “Captcha” box. Then (3) click “Save”.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, September 1, 2021.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

“Of course they taste bad that way. You need to peel the wetsuit off first.”

(by Rich Nagle)

My original caption: ” Yes, son, being a shark requires a 24-7 commitment.”

Wow . . . it’s a big first victory for Rich Nagle! It seems to me that he’s been an on-again, off-again Captioneer for many years, practically since I first started these contests. So this was a well-deserved win, Rich — welcome aboard. You’re now officially confirmed as one of the funniest people around.

Your caption is about a thousand times funnier than my own rather tepid original caption, which dates back to the 1980’s or 1990’s. To this day, I don’t know why I thought it was funny enough for anyone to buy it or publish it — except for The New Yorker, of course. I’m still scratching my head trying to figure out some of the “cartoons” appearing in contemporary issues of TNY. But then again, I recognize that humor is a very personal and subjective matter, and that it can go off in all different directions.

Here are the other captions that I was seriously considering for top honors:

“Forget the fish right now and let’s have some fun scaring the swimmers near the surf.” (by Diane)

“Of course it’s Sushi! Everything down here is Sushi.” (by Brendan Gannon)

“Bob, you’re always going to be just a ‘good white’.” (by Rich Wolf)

“Wanna go swim around in the shallow waters and scare the tourists?” (by Ronn Roxx)

“I know that Chinese cruise ship just sank, but I’m hungry again!” (also by Ronn Roxx)

“Let’s go scare some surfers.” (by Michael Lomazow)

“They say you are what you eat. Maybe that’s why I can talk.” (by Pat Foley). This one made me laugh out loud, Pat!

“Well, dear, welcome to the ‘teen years’ . . . the kids are off in all directions!” (by Kay Ralph)

“The Scavenger Hunt list says it has to be a license plate from Oregon.” (also by Michael Lomazow)

Be on the lookout for the next Contest, Captioneers — it’ll be posted before you know it. Thanks for your input!

Contest No. 176 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I’ll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on “See Comments and Add Your Own”. Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. You may also be asked to verify that you are a human being and not a robot, so please follow the instructions in the “Captcha” box. Then (3) click “Save”.

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. However, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else’s similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Wednesday, August 4, 2021.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.