Cartoons

Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 129


Contest No. 129 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. Also, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest. This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else's similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you may enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, January 23, 2018.  

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions.

 






National Business Employment Weekly, August 11, 1985







Selling Power, May 1999







Nutrition Health Review, 1998







Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 128


                        "I'm afraid it's going to take a month or two

                           to download and install all the updates!"                                                       

                                           (by Dom Mancino)

 

My original caption: "Well, I can't fix it here -- guess I'll have to take it back to the shop."

 

Congratulations once again, Dom Mancino!  This is your seventh win, and it took a long time coming -- your last win was a first place tie 'way back in Contest No. 59! This was a great caption, and it confirms your status as one of the funniest people around.

Speaking of great captions, you captioneers submitted quite a few this time around. I was almost resigned to declaring it another two-way or three-way tie, but finally decided to give the nod to Dom's caption. Here are the others that I was seriously considering:

"Alexa, how do I fix this thing?" (by Sharon)

"Well, here's your problem. It should be '00110110110111010', not '00110110100111010'." (by John Platt)

"I'd better check with my grandfather on this one." (also by John Platt)

"All I know is, red to red, white to white, and black to black." (by TIM COLLINS)

"Yeah, these things tend to break down on the day their 50 year warranty expires." (by Cary Antebi)

"The good news is, this computer is so old, it actually came with a manual." (also by Cary Antebi)

"It doesn't pay fixing it. They've got used ones on ebay for $5.99." (also by Cary Antebi)

"Good thing you took out the super extended warranty!" (by Mel Tanenbaum)

"Can you believe it? This monster computer contains ten trillion bits and it's now worth less than one bitcoin!" (by Gary)

And, finally, there were these two captions which pretty well paraphrased my original caption, from so many years ago:

"I'm gonna have to take it back to the shop!" (also by TIM COLLINS)

"The good news is, I can fix it. The bad news is, I have to bring it back to the shop." (also by Cary Antebi)

Great work, captioneers! Thanks for participating. Look for the next contest in a couple of weeks.






Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 128


Contest No. 128 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save".

Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission. Also, no captions at all will be posted for the first few days of each contest.  This is to give everybody a chance to submit their spontaneous, gut-instinct caption without fear of discovering that it was ripped off by somebody else's similar spontaneous, gut-instinct caption. This is an equal opportunity contest!

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing, but I will only post and consider the first 15 captions from any contestant. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions is midnight Tuesday, January 2, 2018.  

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your funny captions, and it's a really old one. Just look at the size of that "computer" I dreamed up. This guy definitely needs a laptop! Okay, captioneers, let's see what you can do with this relic from the past. Happy New Year!






Rough Notes, August, 1986







Law Practice Management, September 1990







Bureau of Business Practice, 1999







Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 127


     "You know Bill, it is quite unusual for a young associate to be named new                                    product tester and a true honor indeed."

                                             (by Steven Wilson)

 

My original caption: "And now I'd like to show you the flip side of our generous benefits package."

 

Congratulations, Steven Wilson, on your very first winning caption! You now join that very exclusive club -- you can bask in the glory of being one of the funniest people around!

I thought there were lots of very good captions submitted this time, and here are the ones that came "that close":

"Now I'll show you my exit strategy!" (by Harvey Appelbaum)

"Come see the new employee motivation technique I developed . . . ." (by John Platt)

"I thought it was time we sharpened your marketing skills!" (by Brendan Gannon)

"And we're proud to say the company has never missed a deadline." (by Rich Wolf)

"We've made a slight change to our rec room." (by Cary Antebi)

"And here's how we enforce our new zero tolerance policy on sexual harassment. " (by Gary)

One final note: My criterion for picking a winner has always been to put myself in the position of a Cartoon Editor of a magazine and choose the caption that I not only thought was the funniest, but also one that I would not hesitate to print in my publication. The reason I mention this is that for this contest Tim Collins submitted a caption that actually brought a big smile to my face (after I thought about it for a minute), but I really didn't think it was commercially publishable. That caption was: "After we're done here, I'll take you bowling in the basement." HA!

Nice work, captioneers. the next contest should be up in a couple of weeks, so keep a sharp eye open for it.






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