Cartoon Caption Contests

Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 73


It's another tie!

 

                        "Great, the 'Divorce for Dummies' book arrived."

                                               (by Cary Antebi)

                                "It finally arrived -- my divorce papers." 

                                            (by Howard Garrett)

 

My original caption: "Oh, good -- my do-it-yourself divorce kit!" (And, on an older version of the cartoon, my caption was "Just the usual stuff in the mail, dear . . . bills . . . coupons . . . my do-it-yourself divorce kit . . . "). Neither the longer version nor the shorter one was ever bought or published.

 

Congratulations, you two. This is your seventeenth win, Cary Antebi, and your third one, Howard Garrett. So I'll just say it again for all to hear -- you've got to be two of the funniest people around!

Here are the other captions that I was seriously considering for top honors:

"They say you may already be a winner -- those liars." (by Dale Stout)

"'CELEBRATE 'OUR' WINNINGS FROM BETTING!' The newest IRS pamphlet!" (by drmrs)

Don't despair -- a new contest will be coming up soon.

 






Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 73


Contest No. 73 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, September 23, 2014.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption. I'm hoping you'll all come up with some really funny ones this time -- please don't disappoint me.

 






Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 72


                     "I know the nurse, but who the hell are you two?"

                                         (by Howard Garrett)

 

My original caption: "My only regret is that I never had anything to blab to the tabloids."

 

My heartfelt congratulations, Howard Garrett! This is your second win, and once again you can bask in the glory of being "One of the Funniest People Around".

There were lots of good captions submitted, and quite a few, I thought, were funnier than my rather tame original caption. Here are the ones that almost made it:

"Stop standing there and do something to get me out of here!" (by Anne Noonan)

"Who's standing on my catheter?" (by Dale Stout)

"Can we just take one last selfie?" (by Levi)

"It was the damn ED pill!" (by Joe Flynn) [ED=Erectile Dysfunction]

"Get the hell out of here. I'm missing the Jerry Springer Show." (also by Howard Garrett)

"I've prepared for this moment and I'm ready to go. Nurse, bring me my bed pan." (by Cary Antebi)

 

Good captioning, everyone. Be on the lookout for Contest No. 73 -- it'll be showing up real soon.






Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 72


Contest No. 72 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, September 2, 2014.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption.






Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 71


                                      " Holds 100 fortune cookies."

                                                    (by Jo Pette)

 

         My original caption: "Oh yes, sir, I guarantee it's a genuine Ming vase."

 

Congratulations, Jo Pette -- you finally made it into the sacred inner circle of winners! At long last you have earned the right to be considered one of the funniest people around.

There were many interesting captions submitted -- and thanks for keeping them (mostly) politically correct! After I posted this contest drawing, I heard from people who were concerned that I would probably get many racially-offensive captions. But you all stayed on top of the situation -- in fact, the most offensive caption was probably my own original one!

These were some of the other captions that I was seriously considering for top prize:

"Believe me, that is NOT one of my vases!" (by Anne Noonan)

"Of course it's made in China. Do you know anything that isn't?" (by Cary Antebi)

"That's not for sale, it's my cookie jar." (by Dale Stout)

"Comes with ancient Chinese curse . . . 33% tax." (also by Cary Antebi)

Thanks for participating. Be on the lookout for the next contest. It'll be coming up soon.






Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 71


Contest No. 71 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, August 12, 2014.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption.






Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 70


              "You'll want to watch The Animal Channel . . . it's Sloth Week."

                                                (by Cary Antebi)

 

My original caption: "You're not up to code, Harvey, so I'm leaving you."

 

Hey, congratulations, Cary Antebi -- you put in a lot of effort here and one of your 34 (yes, 34!) captions has won again . . . and it's your sixteenth win! Once again you are entitiled to be recognized as one of the funniest people around.

These are some of the other captions that I was considering for top honors (but I'm warning you, most of them are by Cary Antebi):

"I love going door to door selling luggage so that you can enjoy watching TV." (by Howard Garrett)

"I'll be back when football season is over." (by Kelasher)

"When he said, 'Don't touch that dial', he didn't mean forever." (by Cary Antebi)

"THIS is reality! You might want to try it sometime besides watching it on TV." (also by Cary Antebi)

"I'm sick and tired of you asking me, 'Do you know 15 minutes can save you 15% or more on car insurance?'" (also by Cary Antebi)

"It's called 'Walking out on you', but then, you wouldn't know much about walking." (also by Cary Antebi)

Don't touch that dial or lose heart, folks -- a new contest will be up soon and you know you can't win it if you're not in it.






Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 70


Contest No. 70 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, July 22, 2014.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption.






Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 69


                      "Let me see your license, registration, and mortgage."

                                                    (by Cary Antebi)

                                   "License, registration and mortgage."

                                                     (by Dale Stout)

 

My original caption: "Okay, Mac, where's the foyer?"

 

Yes, it's a tie! Amazingly enough, the two almost identical winning captions were submitted practically simultaneously. I approved and posted them both at the same time, so there was no hanky-panky copying involved. Congratulations, Cary Antebi (fifteenth win) and Dale Stout (fifth win). You are definitely two of the funniest people around!

Other captions that I was considering for top honors:

"Your dining room light is out." (by John Platt)

"Actually, I'm not sure if I can give you a ticket because your car is now in New York even though your trailer is in Jersey." (by Ritchie)

 

My original caption is an unforgivable pun, of course. I still fantasize that there must be a motorcycle cop somewhere out there, just itching to pull over a speeding gigantic RV or trailer so that he can ask, "Okay, Mac, where's the foyer?"  Disgraceful pun or not, I really liked the cartoon a lot and had great hopes for selling it to some big publication.

Here's a short, short story about the cartoon:

I was so enthusiastic about it that I included it in a batch I was bringing to Bob Mankoff, Cartoon Editor of The New Yorker, on a Tuesday "Look Day". I was doing this even though it was common knowledge that cartoons with puns were frowned upon, if not totally banned, at The New Yorker.

So there I was, facing Bob Mankoff across his desk, as he was going through my batch, separating the flatout rejections from the ones he would be holding. I watched as he looked at this cartoon and then put it face down into the "Reject" pile. I couldn't help but make a comment. I said, "I guess you don't like to print puns in The New Yorker, huh?"  There was total silence from Bob Mankoff as he stared at me for a moment. Then he did a classic double-take, picked up the cartoon and turned it over. After studying it again for a few long seconds, he placed it back in the "Reject" pile and muttered, "Well, not that one, anyway."

End of story. Also the end of my enthusiasm for the cartoon.

 

Keep up the good work, folks. A new caption contest will be coming up soon.






Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No.69


Contest No. 69 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on "Add New Comment". Then (2) scroll down past any other submitted captions and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) click "Save". Your caption (or captions) will be posted after I review your submission.

There is no limit on the number of captions you can enter for each drawing. Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption.

The cut-off time and date for you to send in your captions for this contest is midnight Tuesday, July 1, 2014.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption). Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Below is the drawing that needs your caption.






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