March 2011

Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 20


captioncontest201.jpg "My daughter will be right down . . . as soon as she puts on her glockenspiel." (by Cary Antebi)

My original caption: "My daughter tells me you're a musician of some sort."

Congratulations again, Cary Antebi -- this is your sixth win, so you are definitely one of the funniest people around.

The use of that "funny" word, glockenspiel, was inspired. For me, it's what gave that caption the winning edge (it's not only a funny word, but the thought of someone putting one on is also a funny image).

Some of the other captions I was considering for top prize:

"Have you considered strumming a guitar under her window instead?" (by Kelasher -- a very strong second-place finisher), "So, you joined a High School marching band . . . tell me, in what State did you plan to do your practice sessions????" (by Dom Mancino) and "You can go to my daughter's room now . . . just make sure I don't hear that drum stop beating." (another one by Cary Antebi).

New contest will be up shortly -- keep up the good work!






Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 20


Cartoon Caption Contest No. 20 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on 'COMMENTS' underneath the current drawing. Then (2) scroll down past all the other comments and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) enter the anti-spam security word that assures me that you're a human being and not a machine, and (4) click 'Submit'. There is no limit on the number of captions you can submit for each drawing.

Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption. The cut-off time and date for you to submit your captions for this contest is midnight, Tuesday, March 29, 2011.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption).

Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Got your gagwriting caps on? Here's the new drawing: captioncontest20.jpg






Winner of Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 19


captioncontest19a.jpg "So let me see if I understand: the pellet with the poison is in the vessel with the pestle; the chalice from the palace has the brew that is true?" (by Kelasher)

My original caption: "Don't you know, little fool, you never can win? Use your mentality! Wake up to reality!"

Wow, congratulations again, Kelasher! This is your sixth win, so you certainly deserve to be considered one of the funniest people around.

In case anyone doesn't recognize it, Kelasher's caption is part of a famous routine from Danny Kaye's 1955 classic film, "The Court Jester". No, I don't think it's a very "commercial" caption, and I doubt that any cartoon editor could ever be convinced to publish it, but I chose it for one reason and one reason only -- it made me laugh!

As for my original caption (also in case anyone doesn't recognize it), the lines come directly from Cole Porter's classic song "I've Got You Under My Skin". Yes, when other people listen to Frank Sinatra's famous rendition of that song, they think, "What a beautiful love ballad". When I listen to it, I think "What a bunch of psychobabble!". As I mentioned before, I still can't figure out why The New Yorker (and dozens of other publications) turned my cartoon down.

Other captions that I was considering for top prize: "I'm sorry to be the one to break this to you . . . but you need to hear it. Santa Claus does not exist." (by Jonathan). "Would you mind sitting in on our group therapy session today? We're missing a ten of diamonds." (by Levi -- it took me a while to figure out that the guy on the couch was a "joker"). "Surely you Jest . . . " (by Jo Michaels -- short and sweet). "Your problem is, nobody is laughing at your jokes about moats and dragons any more." (by Cary Antebi).

Well, that should do it for psychiatrists for a while. New contest coming up soon.






Eli's Cartoon Caption Contest No. 19


Cartoon Caption Contest No. 19 starts right now.

Briefly, here are the details: I'll supply a drawing of one of my old cartoons that has never been published, leaving off my caption. You are invited to supply your funniest captions. Simply (1) click on 'COMMENTS' underneath the current drawing. Then (2) scroll down past all the other comments and type in your name and your caption in the spaces provided. Then (3) enter the anti-spam security word that assures me that you're a human being and not a machine, and (4) click 'Submit'. There is no limit on the number of captions you can submit for each drawing.

Entries will be accepted and posted for one week, after which a winner will be announced and the winning caption will be printed. Below that I will also print my original caption. The cut-off time and date for you to submit your captions for this contest is midnight, Tuesday, March 8, 2011.

I will be the sole judge. The winning caption will be the one I judge to be the funniest one submitted (not necessarily the one that matches or comes closest to my original caption).

Additional rules and regulations, for those of you who need such things, can be found here.

Here's the drawing for this contest. What's that you say -- oh, no, not another damned psychiatrist drawing?!! Let's keep in mind that statistics prove that 49% of all gag cartoons are about psychiatrists (another 49% are desert isle gags, which leaves very little room for any other subjects). All kidding aside, yes, it's another psychiatrist situation, so I hope you're feeling nutty and can come up with some good captions. I'm very proud of my original caption, so I think you'll have a tough time beating it -- I still can't figure out why my original didn't sell somewhere, like even to The New Yorker. Good luck! captioncontest19a.jpg